Faculty Shoe Game: A Comprehensive Ranking

Ishan Bhattacharyya ’23 | Shawn Wang ’23

#1 Ms. Cynthia Crum: Connoisseur of College Counseling

When it comes to the “shoe game,” some prioritize quantity, and some prioritize quality. Ms. Crum has both in her collection. Her shoe rack is an embodiment of uniqueness, as beautiful as it is expansive. There is wolf gray and blood red, the classiest footwear and the most comfortable, all encapsulated in these eleven rows of dazzling brilliance. One could even metaphorize this image, saying that it embodies the strength and vivacity of the College Counseling Office along with the incredible volume of the college application process. Overall, we were completely blown away by this incredible performance. As for the interview, Ms. Crum similarly brought her jovial spirit. “You know what, I love a good shoe! It makes a statement and finishes my outfit. It’s a little shallow, but I love a good shoe.” We do too, Ms. Crum! Simply astounding.

#2 Mrs. Molly Konopka: Laudable Latin Legend

You better believe that this footwear abides by the dress code. With this simple, clean display of excellence in shoe game, Mrs. Konopka cements her place as a force of fashion in the Classics Department. Referencing last year’s inspiring Chapel theme, these shoes balance both the “light” and the “darkness,” all tied up with two golden bows straight out of a Latin poem. Though this is just a single example, Mrs. Konopka arrives at school every day with this kind of quality attire. While absolutely crushing her interview after our initial selection, Mrs. Konopka offered a profound take: “I think shoes are important, but they also have to be wearable. When you’re on your feet all day, you have to wear comfortable shoes.” Calceamina pulcherrimae sunt, Mrs. Konopka!

#3 Mrs. Jennifer Jones: Beloved Bipedal Biologist

Donning these cookies-and-cream snappers from Toms, Mrs. Jones comes in hot onto our list. These high-top, zebra-patterned shoes add a classic touch to the everyday dress code. As many start to work in those fall colors, like vibrant orange or pale yellow, Mrs. Jones goes beyond the herd, sticking with small black polka dots. Perhaps trying to raise student morale during mid semester and college app season, our in-house biologist sports shoes that are sharp, yet fun. We have only one concern: how can her students pay attention in class with these sparkly shoes, front-and-center, reflecting light into their eyes? When told that she looked great, Mrs. Jones replied, “I know. Shoes make an outfit. I prefer mine to be simple but stylish.” Safe to say, the science department has not only big, but also fashionable shoes to fill!